*When Suresh Padgaonkar was diagnosed with HIV/AIDS in 2000, all his dreams and aspirations for a lifetime were snuffed out in a second. *
He had little hope of getting a job or a respectable life; even the hours and days seemed to come in instalments.
Occasionally, his mother would start crying on spotting a baraat (marriage procession), knowing well that her son would never mount the ghodi (ceremonial horse) to fetch a bride for himself. Then friends and relatives began to pester enquiring 'why a good-looking boy like you isn't getting married?' That is when Suresh decided to start a search for an HIV+ girl, like him.
Fortunately, the 26-year-old was referred to a marriage portal exclusively for HIV/AIDS victims, and met Shalini who was not just HIV+ but belonged to the same district and even the same caste as his. The marriage took place with much jubilation two years back and now they even have a little girl, who is HIV negative, unlike her parents.
After God and his mother, who supported him unconditionally, Suresh thanks Anil Valve, the founder of PositiveSaathi.com, the website that enabled him to get a life partner and a normal existence. Fortunately, it's not just Valve, but a number of other benevolent souls, across India, are now starting matrimonial websites for the chronically ill and disabled.
Though the number of such websites in the country can be counted on the fingertips, it goes without saying that they are making a heaven-and-hell difference to the lives of many suffering from stigmatised and life-threatening ailments.
Dr Ashok Jhingan, diabetologist and chairman, Delhi Diabetes Research Centre, has presided over the marriage of over 100 girls, though, he has only one of his own. He is the founder of DiabeticMatrimony.com - a marriage portal for those suffering from Diabetes Type I mainly. This is a disease which sets in childhood and requires taking insulin shots several times daily.
He says, "It all began with this young girl who was my patient. She got married to a well-off guy. I even attended her wedding. Three days later, she was thrown out of her matrimonial home as her in-laws came to know about her problem. Another girl, I knew, in similar circumstances, went into depression. I realised, I must do something for these children."
Take the case of Anil Valve, a Regional Transport Officer based in Pune, who understood the gravity of HIV/AIDS while working with truck drivers, one of the highest risk groups for this infection and started PositiveSaathi.com. "Some of them," he says, "were so desperate for sex, they could sleep with any woman without informing her about their condition."
"The fact of the matter is that if the sexual needs of such persons is not fulfilled, there is a real danger that they will spread the infection. But why only truck drivers, even HIV patients from good families, who would not do so, deserve a healthy and happy life."
Though India currently has a population of over 21 million physically and mentally-challenged persons, it is a shame that there are barely any matrimonial websites catering to them. One of the very few available, iMilap.com, deals in the physically-challenged and operates from Seattle, Washington.
Its founder Navita Batra spoke to Metrolife over phone, "First, it is very difficult to convince a deaf and mute or a paraplegic person that he can have a normal marital life. Then awareness regarding our sites is very low. But I am happy to see more and more people signing up on our website and creating profiles."
"Sometimes, we don't even get to know when they hook up and get married. We hear from friends and relatives later on, that they have had children," she smiles."I like to think of it as a bus stop," philosophises Valve, "where a person comes looking for a bus. Does the transport manager in the depot get to know that a passenger has got the bus and left?"
"But we have created the platform at least. Hopefully, many will find their bus from here." Reported by Deccan Herald 9 hours ago.
He had little hope of getting a job or a respectable life; even the hours and days seemed to come in instalments.
Occasionally, his mother would start crying on spotting a baraat (marriage procession), knowing well that her son would never mount the ghodi (ceremonial horse) to fetch a bride for himself. Then friends and relatives began to pester enquiring 'why a good-looking boy like you isn't getting married?' That is when Suresh decided to start a search for an HIV+ girl, like him.
Fortunately, the 26-year-old was referred to a marriage portal exclusively for HIV/AIDS victims, and met Shalini who was not just HIV+ but belonged to the same district and even the same caste as his. The marriage took place with much jubilation two years back and now they even have a little girl, who is HIV negative, unlike her parents.
After God and his mother, who supported him unconditionally, Suresh thanks Anil Valve, the founder of PositiveSaathi.com, the website that enabled him to get a life partner and a normal existence. Fortunately, it's not just Valve, but a number of other benevolent souls, across India, are now starting matrimonial websites for the chronically ill and disabled.
Though the number of such websites in the country can be counted on the fingertips, it goes without saying that they are making a heaven-and-hell difference to the lives of many suffering from stigmatised and life-threatening ailments.
Dr Ashok Jhingan, diabetologist and chairman, Delhi Diabetes Research Centre, has presided over the marriage of over 100 girls, though, he has only one of his own. He is the founder of DiabeticMatrimony.com - a marriage portal for those suffering from Diabetes Type I mainly. This is a disease which sets in childhood and requires taking insulin shots several times daily.
He says, "It all began with this young girl who was my patient. She got married to a well-off guy. I even attended her wedding. Three days later, she was thrown out of her matrimonial home as her in-laws came to know about her problem. Another girl, I knew, in similar circumstances, went into depression. I realised, I must do something for these children."
Take the case of Anil Valve, a Regional Transport Officer based in Pune, who understood the gravity of HIV/AIDS while working with truck drivers, one of the highest risk groups for this infection and started PositiveSaathi.com. "Some of them," he says, "were so desperate for sex, they could sleep with any woman without informing her about their condition."
"The fact of the matter is that if the sexual needs of such persons is not fulfilled, there is a real danger that they will spread the infection. But why only truck drivers, even HIV patients from good families, who would not do so, deserve a healthy and happy life."
Though India currently has a population of over 21 million physically and mentally-challenged persons, it is a shame that there are barely any matrimonial websites catering to them. One of the very few available, iMilap.com, deals in the physically-challenged and operates from Seattle, Washington.
Its founder Navita Batra spoke to Metrolife over phone, "First, it is very difficult to convince a deaf and mute or a paraplegic person that he can have a normal marital life. Then awareness regarding our sites is very low. But I am happy to see more and more people signing up on our website and creating profiles."
"Sometimes, we don't even get to know when they hook up and get married. We hear from friends and relatives later on, that they have had children," she smiles."I like to think of it as a bus stop," philosophises Valve, "where a person comes looking for a bus. Does the transport manager in the depot get to know that a passenger has got the bus and left?"
"But we have created the platform at least. Hopefully, many will find their bus from here." Reported by Deccan Herald 9 hours ago.